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April 18, 2005
So Wrong...Yet So Right
From Beth, shameless hussy
Thank you, Lani, for spawning the Literary Chicks’ official No Shame Week (girl’s a genius, I tell you.) We will be confessing our deepest, darkest predilections over the next 7 days and you can sit back and judge us harshly. Or break down and admit that you, too, have a weakness for…
KRAFT MACARONI AND CHEESE
As delicious as it is orange. One of the best things about being an official adult is that I can have mac’n’cheese for dinner (or lunch, or even breakfast) whenever I see fit. Which turns out to be quite often.
And yes, it must be Kraft. I’m appallingly snobbish about what brands of cut-rate pre-packaged pasta dinners I’ll ingest. Ironic, no?
ABBA
"You can dance…you can jiiive…having the time of your life…"
Then, of course, there's...
SCARY BOOKS ABOUT SERIAL KILLERS
Especially those by Lisa Gardner, Tess Gerritsen, and John Douglas (his are the scariest of all, because he’s a former FBI profiler who writes about cases that actually happened.) This kind of reading material is not shameful, but the fact that I have to sleep with the lights on for several days after I finish a book is. My husband and the dogs form a voting bloc and lobby to move me to the guest bedroom if I’m going to insist on keeping the lamp lit all night, but they will never prevail. Guest bedrooms are well-known watering holes for mass murderers. I watch Court TV; I know what’s up.
GEORGE MICHAEL’S "FAITH" ALBUM
Best. CD. Ever.
"BILL AND TED’S EXCELLENT ADVENTURE"
The line, "Strange things are afoot at the Circle K" got even funnier once I moved to California, where they actually have Circle K stores. One of my all-time favorite movies. And so educational! To this day, I will drop everything if it comes on cable.
Bonus points for rhyming "Freud" with "dude."
CADBURY MINI EGGS
Not to be confused with Cadbury Crème Eggs, which are entirely different. Why the hell don’t they make the mini eggs all year round? Cadbury’s stubborn refusal to do so leaves me no choice but to hoard them at Easter. How degrading. Damn you, heartless candy barons!
BARGAIN HUNTING AT T.J. MAXX, MARSHALL’S AND LOEHMANN’S
Shameful because sometimes I will buy things JUST BECAUSE they are on sale: "The dress is eh, but the deal is too great to pass up!!!" And often you really can find hidden treasure buried among the racks. In fact, last weekend I snapped up a $300 Tahari denim jacket for the bargain price of…okay, it was still expensive, but it was a RELATIVE bargain.
"90210" RE-RUNS
I will always have a soft spot for the old-school episodes. My favorite plotline is the one where Dylan and Brenda break up and she goes to Paris for the summer and convinces Dean Cain, aka doofy American tourist Rick, that she’s French. And then she comes home to find that while she was abroad, Dylan took up with Kelly. Gasp! And then Rick (or "Reek," as faux Frenchie Brenda must call him) comes to town and takes her to a swanky restaurant where they run into her faithless brooding poet ex-boyfriend and the little blonde minx and it totally disintegrates into a catfight. Now that’s entertainment.
Now say it with me, y’all: "Donna Martin graduates! Donna Martin graduates!"
Posted by at 1:29 AM
