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January 12, 2006
Being late . . .
. . . and early at the same time.!
The first thing I think of when I think of being late is when I looked at my husband of approximately two months and said, “Honey, I’m late. I’m thinking that maybe this barfing in the morning thing might have to do with something other than bad Mexican food from the new place on Halsted.”
It’s not like we weren’t planning on having children. It’s just that we had been hoping to be married for more than a nano-second before we began procreating. We’d been hoping to maybe go on a honeymoon, for instance. I’d just started a new job and it had been hard enough to get time off for the wedding, much less an extended honeymoon right afterward. Oh, and if you think telling your husband you’re knocked up when you weren’t planning on it, try telling your boss of three months.
So Thing One was born a year or so before we’d planned on producing a Thing One. We adjusted. Then when Thing One was about a year old, we moved to Arizona. Whew! We congratulated ourselves on having the baby while I still had the bodacious health insurance from my job rather than the not quite so fabulous insurance my husband had at the time.
So, being late and early ended up being a good thing.
Then a few months after that, I said to my husband, “Honey, I’m late. I’m thinking that maybe this barfing in the morning thing might have to do with something other than that virus that is going around.”
It’s not like we weren’t planning on having another child. It’s just that we had been hoping to wait another year or so. Once again, we adjusted and Thing Two made his appearance in the world a little early as well.
Then on June 14, 1998, my husband had a seizure that landed him in the emergency room. Within a few weeks, he had been diagnosed with a brain tumor. He died on July 20, 1999.
Now, if I hadn’t been late and the kids hadn’t been early, they each would have had one less precious year with their Dad. He was a great guy and he loved them like crazy and taking even one more second from him or them would have been a crime.
This blog was brought to you by Beth's latest release, Fashionably Late, a story about love, family, fashion... and what a difference it can make if you're just willing to rip out a seam or two.
Posted by Eileen at 12:11 PM | Comments (14)
Comments
We love you, Eileen. Late or early.
Alesia
Posted by: Alesia Holliday ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.literarychicks.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at January 12, 2006 11:28 AM
Wow. Fate. Intuition. Nothing is an accident is it?
Posted by: Bethany at January 12, 2006 12:43 PM
Or everything's an accident. Either way, in the words of Bill Watterson (of Calvin and Hobbes), I've got the heebie-jeebies.
Posted by: Eileen at January 12, 2006 1:12 PM
Beautiful essay, Eileen.
Sending you a big cyber hug, until I can give you a real one in person . . .
Posted by: Whitney at January 12, 2006 1:47 PM
Thanks, Whitney. Hugs back to you, too!
Posted by: Eileen at January 12, 2006 3:58 PM
Eileen, I read DO ME, DO MY ROOTS while sitting in the lobby of a hotel in Chicago (for a SEP book signing) while my roommate slept upstairs. The desk clerks, custodial staff, and other hotel patrons all gave me strange looks and questioned my mental health (loudly) as I sat in my cozy little twill armchair and bawled my eyes out.
Now you've made me do it again, but in the privacy of my own home. Thanks for your wonderful books, your brilliant word-smithing (yes, that's a word because I just said it was), and for sharing your story with us here.
Teble
Posted by: Teble at January 12, 2006 5:36 PM
Teble,
I'm so flattered and pleased that you like my books and my wordsmithery. :-) I seem to be blessed (or possibly cursed) with living my life on the line between bitter and sweet. Not everybody "gets" it. Thanks for going there with me.
Posted by: Eileen at January 12, 2006 7:32 PM
Do you see why we love her so much? Do you SEE?
Beautiful essay, Eileen. Thanks for classing the joint up. ;)
Posted by: Lani at January 12, 2006 7:57 PM
Hugs! Fate does have a way of stepping in...
Posted by: TeresaH at January 13, 2006 2:33 AM
Oh, Eileen, you brought a tear to my eye!
*Sniffle*
Michelle
Posted by: Michelle C at January 13, 2006 7:17 AM
I didn't realize that Do Me was based on such a big element of your life, Eileen.
And BTW, I can't make any of the links to your books work on your website, grrrr (that grrrr isn't addressed to you, just faulty programing in general).
I see that I am way behind on reading your books, so I guess a trip to B&N is on for the weekend. Thank goodness today is payday.
H
Posted by: Holly at January 13, 2006 9:48 AM
Holly,
Hmmm. Did you try the "buy now" buttons below the books? I'll go drag my webmaster out of hiding and make him fix it anyway.
Eileen
Posted by: Eileen at January 13, 2006 12:01 PM
DD#1 was planned, but DD#2 was sort of an "oops"--I can so relate to the barfing and trying to justify it as ANYTHING OTHER than being pregnant. "Oh, I must be constipated." "Maybe just a touch of the flu." "Hmm, will you buy constipated AND the flu?!" But she has been a wonderful "oops" and I am so grateful that we have her. Planning a family really doesn't work that well. If you wait until you can afford them, you will NEVER have kids! Or something happens and the opportunity is lost forever. Your words made me cry and now I need to go hug my hubby and kids real hard and thank the Lord that I have them all--cyber hugs to you and yours! You reminded me of what is important in life.
Posted by: Sheri at January 14, 2006 9:54 AM
Waiting until I could afford kids? I wish! I'd been hoping to wait until I had my own washer and dryer. Give yourself a hug, took Sheri.
Posted by: Eileen at January 14, 2006 10:10 PM
