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February 24, 2006
Indestructible Food
...Like Dwarf Bread, Except Much Tastier
So, anyone here a Terry Pratchett fan?
Every member of my household is a total devotee, and we always buy God Terry's latest book in hardback because we cannot, cannot wait until the paperback version emerges several months later. It's just not doable.
Anyway, last October we bought Thud, God Terry's latest book. Because I was writing, Oh Patient One read it first, and then Teenager #2 read it, and then, finally, at the weekend it was MY TURN! Yay!
I planned the day. I was going to stay in bed the whole of Saturday and read it whilst resident slaves (namely Oh Patient One and Teenager #2) pandered to my every whim. Or at least remembered to bring me frequent cups of tea and the odd sandwich for sustenance, here or there.
Except Teenager #2 had lent it to a friend. Yes. My Saturday Plan slipped sadly through my fingers. Let's just say I wasn't in the best of moods and generally grumbled under my breath the whole weekend.
So when I was in Manhattan a few weeks later, I had lunch with Nice Publicists at HarperCollins, and we were chatting about books, and I mentioned how much I loved Terry, and they very kindly GAVE ME A COPY OF THUD, and other various HarperCollins titles. I love people who give me books. I love Nice Publicists even if they don't give me books, because they are just so, well, nice...
Anyway...
Teenager #1 was staying in the hotel with me, because she is in college not far from Manhattan and it gave us time to catch up on everything. Poor Teenager #1 (with big, sad, doe eyes) told me that she would have to wait for the paperback version because hardback books were beyond her student means. I took pity on her and lent her my gift copy on the understanding that she brought it with her when she came to vist us at Christmas.
She forgot.
In the meantime, Teenager #2's friend forgot to give back our original copy...
So I helpfully reminded Teenager #2 (because as you know, I never nag, God forbid), and helpfully reminded him some more, and finally I forgot.
Until one day I remembered and prompted him about it.
Teenager #2: "But my friend gave it back weeks ago," he informed me.
Me: "But I haven't seen it."
Teenager #2: "It's on one of the bookshelves under P for Pratchett."
Me (absolutely excited and then totally deflated): "No, it's not," checking under P for Pratchett.
Anyway. I turned the apartment upside down looking for this book. For days on end. Until, finally, one day when I was looking for a book to read, and I was skimming the P's, THERE WAS THUD, right where it should be, under P for Pratchett.
I swear the house fairies were playing a trick on me. Or whatever.
So finally, I wallowed in, I luxuriated in Thud - it was every bit as wonderful as I thought it would be, and when I finished it I read it again.
But I've totally digressed from Indescructible Food...
See. God Terry has Dwarf Bread in his books, and it is totally indestructible as well as totally inedible, and you would rather do absolutely anything than eat this bread, and just thinking about eating it completely destroys your appetite.
The reason I mention this is because the Dutch have their own particular version of Dwarf Bread, except it is totally edible. Let me introduce you to...the stroopwaffel. They are hard, they are sweet, they are round, and in the middle is a syrupy honeyish type of substance, and everyone, but everyone who comes to vist us, from whichever corner of the globe they hail, completely LOVES them, and always take packets upon packets of them back home with them. Teenager #1 took packets upon packets of them back to NJ, because her friends begged her.
But here's the handy thing about stroopwaffels. They don't melt, they don't break, and they don't seem to rot. When we have gone on driving vacations there and back again, the handy stroopwaffel has been our best friend and often, the odd packet has made it back home with us from wherever we have been, even if they have been sat on, or stomped on, or had heavy suitcases placed on top of them.
They are always still edible at the end of the journey.
If you are ever in the Netherlands, you must try them :-)
But in the meantime, I'd love to hear about your version of Indestructible Food. Or, indeed, how much you love God Terry, too, and which are your favorite books!
Michelle
Posted by Michelle at 11:04 AM | Comments (6)
Comments
I wouldn't say they were indestructible--ie they would squish if you sat on them--but I beleive that Twinkies are the longest-lived food substance on the planet. If there is a nuclear war the only things left will be cockroaches and Twinkies! They don't go stale--ever. They don't even have an expiration date on the package! Scary, when you stop and think about it.... And speaking of Dutch food--do you have those Rusk things out there? I can't remember exactly what they are, but they were brown and round and kind of hard and I don't think I am spelling it right but we were crazy about them when I was a kid. My family is Dutch and so is most of the town I am from. The grocery store has an entire AISLE devoted to Dutch foods. Windmill cookies--mmmm, my favorites!! Dutch pastries are the BEST!!!
Posted by: Sheri at February 24, 2006 8:41 PM
I'm still waiting to find a friend who lives there or my dad to travel there to bring some stroopwafels back for me.
Unless I get there first, of course. ;)
Posted by: May at February 24, 2006 10:31 PM
I lived in the Netherlands and also in Beligum. If I may be so bold- the Sucrewaffle in Beligum just might be superior. Having said that- any sugar infusion is a good, good thing. Least my hips reduce in size- stoopwaffels are now sold here in Vancouver.
Posted by: Eileen at February 25, 2006 1:31 AM
My favorite Terry Pratchett is the one he wrote with Neil Gaiman called GOOD OMENS. Very very fun take on the battle between good and evil.
My favorite indesctructible food is Cheez Whiz. I am fully aware that there is probably no cheese in it and that it is actually a petroleum product, but I don't care.
Posted by: Eileen at February 26, 2006 1:13 PM
Sheri - I'm not sure about the rusk things, but stroopwaffels are round and brown and hard. And windmill cookies - the ones with cinnamon in them, I think they are speculas?
May - and anyone else who is interested in tasting a real stroopwaffel - I'll bring some packs to the RWA national conference in July ;-)
Eileen #1 - the sucrewaffles sound delicious - I'll look out for them next time I'm in Antwerp!
Eileen #2 - I love that book, too, but my most favorite Terry books are the witchy and guard ones.
Posted by: Michelle C at February 27, 2006 6:46 AM
Me! Me! I want a stroopwaffel! I'll trade you a bag of Belly Flops. They're the factory seconds from the enormous Jelly Belly factory near here.
Eileen
Posted by: Eileen at February 27, 2006 11:22 AM
