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March 6, 2006
Guilty Of Being A Bad Mom
That's right, I confess . . .
My house has been a bachlorette pad for the past four days. George took our son to visit his family in San Antonio for the weekend, and so I've been on my own.
I can't even remember the last time I was alone. I mean really alone, with my days to do with as I please. It's been years, maybe more than a decade. The idea scared me at first . . . what would I do with all of that free time? No diapers to change . . . no meals to cook . . . . no middle-of-the-night wake-ups . . .
Then I got over that.
I've spent the last four days shopping, eating out at cute little lunch cafes, and spending hours in the local coffee shop, downing lattes and working on some new book proposals. And although I miss my guys, and am looking forward to their return this evening, I've enjoyed every minute of my solitude.
People have had weird reactions to my choosing not to accompany the guys to San Antonio.
"You mean, you're letting your husband take your son? Without you?" they keep asking me.
I'm not sure if they're surprised I'd trust George to take Sam without me, or if they think I'm a Bad Mother for not insisting on going with them. Probably the latter. I don't know what the big deal is. I've done it before -- struggling to get on a plane with a baby, stroller, bulging diaper bag and all of the various baby paraphernalia -- and no one was ever shocked that George didn't go along with us.
On one of my solo trips, Sam screamed the entire way through a three-hour flight. He was still nursing at the time, and I was so overwhelmed, I had both boobs out, all modesty forgotten, desperately trying to get him to latch on to something, anything, while the woman next to me kept saying helpful things like, "His ears are probably popping, maybe you should have him drink something."
When the stewardess asked if there was anything she could do to help, I looked at her and said, deadly serious, "Please get me a vodka on the rocks."
She laughed, and moved on, while I called after her, "No! I�m serious! Vodka!"
But Sam's screams drowned out my pleas, and I never did get that drink. Damn her.
Anyway, from what I hear, this trip has been going much more smoothly, so I'm thinking that maybe we should do this more often. A visit to the grandparents for them . . . and a visit to the spa for me!
This blog was brought to you by Blondes Have More Felons, Alesia’s first December Vaughn Mystery – there’s nothing like December in Florida!
Posted by Whitney at 10:31 AM | Comments (7)
Comments
I took Princess and Science Boy to Japan, from Seattle, by myself, when she was still a toddler in diapers, to visit Judd in the middle of one of his 6-month overseas deployments. Somewhere around the middle of that loooooooong flight, I was ready to be locked in a rubber room. And isn't it amazing how many people will watch you struggling with a baby, a toddler, a diaper bag, a carry-on bag, etc. etc. and NOT offer to help???
I'm celebrating release week with Science Boy's case of stomach flu!! woo hoo! Enjoy your time along while you can . . .
hugs,
Alesia
Posted by: Alesia Holliday ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.literarychicks.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at March 6, 2006 10:46 AM
of course I meant time ALONE. sigh.
Posted by: Alesia Holliday at March 6, 2006 11:18 AM
Hello? Sign me up. Solitude? Aloneness? When does that happen. And as far as letting your hubby take care of the child on a trip. Alone. Go Hubby! I mean, really, you've done it, why not him? :-)
Hope your days alone were spent relaxing and doing all those things you never get to do (coffee shops and uninterrupted writing would be enough for me).
Posted by: Bethany at March 6, 2006 11:54 AM
Those people who are shocked that your husband would travel alone with Same are probably the same people who refer to fathers taking care of their own children as "babysitting"...
Enjoy the solitude!
Posted by: Beth at March 6, 2006 3:09 PM
Ooh. That referring to fathers taking care of their children as "babysitting" really burns my toast. Almost as much as the fathers who really do "babysit" instead of parent.
Posted by: Eileen at March 6, 2006 8:27 PM
When the girls were still very little--DD#1 was just shy of 2 years and DD#2 was 3 months old, I took a trip to Colorado by myself with them. My best friend lived in Dnever and I decided to drive out and see her--I wasn't working at the time, gas was cheap, and I love to travel--not a problem, as far as I could see. My aunt, however, was absolutely appalled that I was bringing those babies 1/2 way across the USA BY MYSELF!! You know what? If I could carry them inside me for 9 months and then spend 12 hours pushing them out into the world, I think I can handle a little car trip with them, okay?! I did start to rethink the rashness of my decision when I hit Vail Pass in the dead of night with no heater in the car (hey, it was warm when I left CA, didn't know it didn't work!) and a snow storm brewing!! So I did the only thing I COULD do--I got behind a snow plow and white-knuckled it down the mountain. We had a great time at my friend's house, catching up on old times, etc, and I helped her with some re-modeling (I pulled up carpet and pulled staples out of the floor while they were at work!). The trip was gorgeous--I took the southern route and really enjoyed the trees changing colors (it was October)--but my aunt didn't speak to me for a month afterwards....The girls were wonderful to travel with and we have made a habit of going away together at least once a year for a weekend at least ever since. And my aunt STILL doesn't approve of it! What are you going to do?!
Posted by: Sheri at March 7, 2006 8:10 PM
Sometimes I feel like I am being a "bad" mom when I have a million things to do and not enough time to spend playing with my kids. I sometimes find it very hard to "play" because I am an adult and feel very silly playing. Sometimes I also feel like a "bad" mom when I can't think of things to do. I don't have alot of money so my resources are limited. Anyone in the same situation??? if yes, can u email me and maybe share some thoughts or ideas. I would appreciate it alot.
Posted by: Cheryl at May 10, 2006 2:23 PM
