Oh, boy. At my brother's first wedding, his bride picked red satiny puffy sleeved things (I think there was a butt bow, not sure, but I know I've worn the HIDEOUS BUTT BOW in at least one wedding). Anyway, in the red thing, I looked like a six-foot-tall sausage. It was shockingly bad. I had to drink a LOT at the reception. Also, the hairstyle they chose was a tight updo designed to complement all of her sisters' wispy thin hair (it was lovely on them). My hair is so thick, they had to make a special trip to the store for industrial-strength bobby pins to hold it in place, plus they used a gallon and a half of hair spray. It took me an hour in the shower and a bottle of conditioner to get out of that hairstyle. The hair-helmeted-sausage look: don't try this at home.

At my sister's second wedding, she wanted me to sing. I was about 8-months along with baby number 2, so I brought along a tasteful black with read accents maternity suit. But my mother would have none of that! No black at a wedding! It was bad luck! (Notice she steered away from the fact that the groom was a lazy, good-for-nothin oaf. Anyway...)

So she made me go to the birdal shop where she bought me-- get this -- a form-fitting bright red velvet gown. Off the shoulder no less. So there I am, pale as usual but moreso thanks to the bright freaking red, looking like Vimpira after she swallowed a basketball. Oh, and to get the thing to fit over my hump, it had to be a size 22, so while it fit over baby, the rest of it was falling off me! (No time for alterations when you buy the dress the day before the wedding.)

Oh, the things our mothers do to us!

I agree with Susan. It is all clever misdirection. Make everyone else in the wedding party look horrible and you as the bride look absolutly stunning in comparison. I know that when I get married, I plan on using a variation of this.

Not really, but it sounded good. Never had a bad bridesmaid dress thank goodness. But I have witnessed a few, but I think that it had more to do with the person in the dress than really the dress.

I think I did wear the dress I wore as matron of honor for my best friend to a special event at church a couple of years later. I did eventually donate the dress I wore to my brother's wedding to charity and was stunned to find it hanging in a Goodwill Store a year or so later!!! I wonder if it never got bought or if it had been brought back! I like to think that the dresses I selected weren't hideous. Maybe I'll post a picture on my blog and ask my readers!

I have been a bridesmail 11 times. ELEVEN. I can tell you stories of dresses that would curl your hair. They tend to fall into a couple of camps:
- Little Bo Beep on crack (always has a butt bow- the larger the better) all you need is a crook and a couple sheep.
- Scarlett O'Hara made from curtains plantation dress- multiple underskirts required.
- The Laura Ashley threw up a garden on me look.

I don't think the ones at my brother's wedding were that bad. Althought I'm a guy, so what do I know?

I do know that guys get off so easy. I've been in three weddings and I haven't had to buy a thing. Of course, tux rentals still are a lot to put out for, but I don't have three tuxes sitting in my closet.

Mark

I hope I'm still not being banned by the Comments Police! We shall see! Alesia, I would pay to see a picture of you as the six-foot-tall-red-sausage. Care to share? Or do I need to get you lickered up first? ;-)

Romance Chick, when I was cleaning out files the other day, I found a page I'd torn from a Talbots catalogue with a gorgeous dress that would look great on bridesmaids (so I think anyway!). I've seen some really classic, pretty dresses (or ones that could be with some adjustment). I'd love to see your bridemaids' dresses, so give us a link if you put a pic up on your site, okay?

My "favorite" was an eggplant purple job. Let's just say...not my color.

I've only been in one wedding, and our dresses were elegant and easily wearable afterward. Ahem. However, being outrageously tall (5'9" - who knew?) I had to have a new skirt made for my dress. Even without the hem, none of the models was long enough. Trouble was, they did it in a rush, barely having it ready in time for the ceremony.

So, long, pencil slim skirt with a two inch "kick" pleat. Yeah, right. I can walk in that. Hah. Dancing. It was a Jewish wedding. Picture me trying to do the hora in a skirt that would do a geisha proud.

I still have that dress somewhere. Now, I look at the rear end on it and marvel that I ever had hips that fit into that skirt. Sigh.

Ooooo--uglydresses.com--I've gone there! NOT pretty, nooooo!!!! My niece had lovely dresses for her bridesmaids. Dark blue, satiny, two-piece dresses, either strapless or very thin straps, and I know the girls have worn them since. My sisters both had their bridesmaids dresses handmade, and I wore mine to church for quite some time after that. We got some kind of dresses in a unit my husband bought that were SO ugly that I was able to tear one up for my daughter's dance performance of "Thriller". She was a dead prom queen--it was a GREAT costume, but I feel for the girl who actually had to wear it somewhere--it was hideous!! LOL

Y'all are hilarious! I am cracking up, reading all your descriptions of your own experiences with bridesmaids' dresses from hell. Eileen, I think those descriptions of bridesmaid dress categories should be posted somewhere permanently! They are too dead-on!