Oh, honey, I'm right there with you. Black Thumb Holliday. I gave up years ago. I actually had a nice veggie & strawberry garden going in Florida, and every day the raccoons and deer came out at dawn and stripped off all the veg and berries. Which proved to me, once and for all, that I'm Not Meant To Garden.
We just need to keep telling ourselves that we have Other Talents. :)

Maybe we could start a support group. Plant Killers Anonymous. I also start the spring season with great expectations of beautiful overflowing pots and waving blooms that butterflies delight in. I go to my local home improvement, I buy and buy and place them out so they look cheerful. Then I forget about them. I find it easier to pray for rain than to actually water them. I'll go out the door, walk by a pot, walk by the spigot, trip over the hose and think, I really should water that plant.

Maybe we're missing a gene. The plant watering gene. Kind of like men and their I forgot our anniversary gene.

Sigh. Do you think Poisen Ivy is the houseplants revenge?

As a Taurus, I'm supposed to be a natural gardener. Instead, I am a Plant Killer who barely remembers to water a plant...once in awhile... *eyes the plant not doing at all well on her desk*

I even killed a LUCKY BAMBOO plant. How bad is that?

Yes! My true sisters, at last! Not those other ones who happen to look a lot like me, but can glance at an African Violet and make it bloom.

Eileen

Make room on the Plant Killer Bench. I have killed everything from cactii to orchids (and no, before you ask, I didn't kill the cactus because I overwatered or anything-- it's just a gift.)

I'm to a point where plants see me coming, they point, laugh, then die a horrible death. And Jennifer, as a Virgo, I'm supposed to be good with the gardening and love being of the earth, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. Right. I'm the girl whose idea of roughing it is when they don't leave the chocolate on the pillow.

I choose to believe that it is not that I killed the plant, rather the plant committed suicide. It apparently lacked the will to live. If it is counting on someone else to fill it's every need than it simply isn't trying hard enough.

Right on, other Eileen! I have had it with this passive-agressive, photo-synthesizing whiners!

Eileen

OMG, I thought I was the only one! The only way anything green survives at our house is if the hubby takes responsibility for it. Typically, the stuff in the front does really well. But the new stuff I got for the new patio? Well, suffice it to say that I think I succeeded in killing a palm tree. And since those are meant for the desert, I think that's saying something...

Y'all are not going to freaking believe this. We're walking out of the house to run an errand and Cowboy looks at me and says, "What were you thinking about doing with the empty spot where the jasmine used to be?" I suggest that the jasmine, which is like a weed, will grow back. He says, "maybe we should keep it trimmed back and plant a rosebush there."

I just stare at him.

He says, "Roses are easy, right?"

I still stare at him.

Then he says, "I'll take care of it. I'll water it and everything."

I still stare at him. This man has watched all the plants die and has never once taken any interest and now NOW when I have decided to give up and not even try to have a plant, he says he'll help.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

How fitting that you post this on the day I am given a plant made from disposed of shreddings from a paper shredder, in an effort to keep me from killing yet another helpless plant!!!

They are helpless, aren't they? They don't even have little legs so they can run away.

Eileen, Have you considered silk plants? You can get a real deal on them at the Pier 1 Outlet. They only require occasional dusting, and won't croak if you forget to dust for a month or two...

Yes! Yes! Me too! If I don't dry them out, I overwater them. I've even killed mint and my lucky bamboo is hanging on to life by a thread. Already it's lived up to it's name by surviving more than a week. Once, in my teens, I managed to grow a thriving plant. Okay, okay, my grandmother actually nurtured it because she thought it was so pretty. Until of course my aunt told her the botanical name...cannibis somethingorother.

Susan, my sweet, what is this dusting thing of which you speak?

Ha! I'd probably even kill a fake plant. Plus, I'm on a de-cluttering binge which you wouldn't know if you saw my house since we are knee deep in knickknacks and musical instruments.

Janina,

YOU GOT YOUR GRANDMOTHER TO GROW YOUR WEED??!!? You are clearly an evil genius. :-)

Eileen