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August 19, 2006
Between You and Me
Secrets, intrigues and intimacies
Back in the stone age when I was graduating from high school, at one of the many ceremonies held by different groups, I was awarded a prize by a number of my peers for a prize for the best kept secret. I graciously accepted the award and prudently, since my parents were around, waited until later to ask what secret I'd done such a good job of keeping to myself.
Seriously, I had no idea.
When they told me what the secret was, I was shocked. I hadn't actually considered it to be that important or interesting so I hadn't talked to anybody about it. Everybody else thought it was this big secret. Trust me, if I thought it had been a secret, it would have been a lot harder to keep it to myself.
There is something delicious about sharing a secret with someone. Telling someone something that you wouldn't tell anyone else somehow shrinks that gap between you and that person in a way that is more intimate even than closing the gap between your body and theirs. Letting someone into your confidence conveys trust in that person's friendship, their honesty and their integrity. It can turn an acquaintance into a serious friend. It can turn a lover into a partner.
Conversely, if sharing a secret backfires, it can explode a relationship into Humpty Dumpty pieces that can never be put together again.
I'm a nosy parker kind of gal. I always want to be in the know. It probably goes along with my inability to not touch people (I am SO SORRY, Alesia). I don't like to have those spaces between you and me. I know though that if I want people to tell me those delicious tidbits of information that can only be talked about on the Q.T., I better not have a reputation for blabbing. I have become so good at keeping secrets that most people don't even know that I have a secret I'm not telling. I am convinced I would make an excellent spy because they wouldn't even know to ask me about stuff.
Thing Two is also an awesome secret keeper. He has one of the best poker faces I have ever seen. He's been that way since birth, I think. Thing One? The worst. Even as a toddler, he couldn't keep anything to himself. It's not malicious. He means no harm. He just can't help himself. He'd make a terrible spy. He'd be the one running up to the bad guys, tugging on their sleeves and saying, "I've got a secret!"
So, are you a secret keeper? Or are you one of those people who spills the beans before anyone's even asked you to pass the ketchup?
This week's blog was brought to you by Between, Georgia, Joshilyn's bold, funny novel about a rural south Juliette, her redneck Romeo, and a family feud that blows Georgia's smallest town wide open.
Posted by Eileen at 7:00 AM | Comments (12)
Comments
Princess is the WORST secret keeper in the universe! Science Boy and I have to tell her the wrong thing now, so she can feel like she's in on the secret, but not give it away. For example, we told her what Navy Guy's birthday present was and the first thing when he got home, she went running up to him:
Princess: I know what your present is, Daddy! But it's a secret!! I'll never tell!
Navy Guy (teasing): I know! It's a pet bunny rabbit!
Princess (indignant): It is NOT! It's a new watch!
Me and Science Boy: AARGHHHHH!!
Me, on the other hand? Even years before I was a lawyer and had attorney-client privilege issues, I was a champ secret keeper. It's "in the vault" and even if a mutual friend asks, I always say, "You should talk to her; I can't share her issues."
I would be a FAB spy, too - hey, Eileen!! Our next job!!!
hugs,
Alesia
Posted by: Alesia Holliday ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.literarychicks.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at August 19, 2006 9:23 AM
We would be awesome spies together! Can you imagine? You could wear that polka dot dress and all the guys would be so astounded, I could slip right in and nab the microfilm or the plans or whatever it is that spies nab.
The LC Eileen
Posted by: Eileen at August 19, 2006 11:03 AM
I'm a secret keeper, guess that's why I've heard so many...
Posted by: TeresaH at August 19, 2006 1:27 PM
I can keep a secret, but am a lousy liar. As long as no one asks me if I'm keeping a secret we're good. Now that I think of it you do sort of have that Alias thing going. You would make a fab spy.
Posted by: Eileen at August 19, 2006 1:59 PM
Ha! You should have seen me when I used to take karate with my kids. Then I had the Alias thing going. Now? Not so much.
The LC Eileen
Posted by: Eileen at August 19, 2006 3:41 PM
No, Eileen, I think YOU should distract the bad guys. You can lick them. Then I'll slip in and steal the secret plans, etc. Or, alternatively, we could be international jewel thieves, which was always my dream.
Posted by: Alesia Holliday at August 19, 2006 6:11 PM
Sadly, I have no poker face, but I'm pretty good at keeping secrets... when I'm thinking about it. I'm the type who lets things slip by accident, like when I was the only one who knew my sister was pregnant. I was talking to my brother about something else, and then made some comment about how my sister wouldn't be working for awhile after October. Luckily, he's kind of an airhead and didn't think to question me on why, but the minute the words were out of my mouth, I froze.... so I'd be a good spy only if I wasn't engaged in conversation! I'd be the Lone Spy... :-D
Posted by: Rebecca at August 20, 2006 11:01 AM
I'm the person everyone tells everything to. I have so much dirt on my friends that I'm surprised that someone hasn't knocked me off yet just to make sure I don't ever say anything! LOL!
I remember one time I made some innocent comment to a friend of mine at work that I had seen a mutual acquaintance the day before, and about an hour later I received the most bizarre phone call from him, just babbling and spilling all sorts of stuff about the two of them! It was so surreal--he is definitely NOT a babbler!! I didn't quite know what to say, so I grabbed him later that day and told him a deep, dark secret of my own so that we were on even footing--now both of us knew something that neither of us wanted anyone else to know, and he KNEW I wouldn't say anything. My husband even questioned me a couple of times and I just acted stupid--I do that well, by the way! LOL!
The strange thing is, I don't really WANT to know all this stuff about other people--it sucks when you can't tell anyone else!!
Posted by: Sheri at August 20, 2006 11:51 AM
Sheri,
This happens to one of my sisters ALL the time. We used to think there was something about her sweet face that made everyone want to confess to her. Then she went to my other sister's masseuse and ended up learning things about him that Sissy One hadn't even heard about it in the three years she'd been going to him.
I think it might be your curse for life.
The LC Eileen
Posted by: Eileen at August 21, 2006 12:56 PM
Eileen said...
He'd be the one running up to the bad guys, tugging on their sleeves and saying, "I've got a secret!"
This makes me think of those people you occasionally see on a plane that have a briefcase handcuffed to their wrist. Talk about, "Hey, over here! I'm the one you want to rob/maim/murder." Who ever came up with that dumb idea? When I worked for the government, they wanted me to wear a government courier badge when carrying classified documents. Do I look that stupid? Well, I did wear it but not where anyone could see it. ;+)
Posted by: ZaZa at August 22, 2006 7:29 PM
Ooh. Did the badge get you any special perqs? Like did you get to cut in line or get a better seat? Then it might be worth doing the equivalent of taping a hundred dollar bill to your booty and yelling victim. :-)
The LC Eileen
Posted by: Eileen at August 23, 2006 9:47 AM
Well, the only practical purpose, as far as I could see, was that the guys who searched people's bags when they went into a building weren't allowed to search you if you had the badge. Classified stuff, and they didn't have the clearances to see it. I never tried to cut the line, only because I never thought of it. ;+)
Posted by: ZaZa at August 23, 2006 10:59 PM
