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August 27, 2006
School Days, School Days
Dear Old Golden Rule Days
Sam recently started preschool. And so far, so . . . well, no. I can’t say so good. Because the truth is, it’s been a bit rocky.
First, there was the class change. Sam began the semester as the youngest kid in his a class, and was quickly overwhelmed. When I came to pick him up, he’d be standing in the middle of the classroom, Thomas the Train lunch box clutched in his hand, looking dazed and confused. I recognized the expression; I used to wear an identical one when I came staggering out of Physics class in high school.
So I readily agreed to move him into the younger kids class. However, I completely underestimated how much he’d bonded with his teacher, Miss Natalie. Because apparently, over the course of the three mornings he spent with her, Sam fell in love. And now, every few days or so, Sam will grow melancholy, and when I ask him what’s wrong, he’ll say in a sad, tremulous voice, "Na-ta-lie.” And then he breaks down into sobs, as though he’s been ripped apart from the great love of his life.
It’s like he’s almost-three going on fifteen.
But, time heals all wounds, so I think he’ll eventually get over his broken heart. And besides, we have other problems to deal with.
Sam’s new class consists of six girls . . . and Sam. That’s right, he’s the only boy. Which really shouldn’t matter, right? Except that it does. Because little girls? They scream. A lot. And they don’t just scream . . . they emit this high pitched squeal that has an immediate and negative effect on the adult nervous system. Every time I hear one of those screeches, it feels like someone is attempting to drill a rusty screw into my temple.
And now Sam, my sweet darling little boy, has picked up this scream.
It’s. Driving. Me. Crazy.
Seriously. It’s like that scene in Dumb and Dumber where Jim Carrey says, “Hey, you want to hear the most annoying sound in the world?” Only worse.
And Sam seems to be getting a kick out of torturing me with it. The other day, he snuck up behind me while I was chilling out on the sofa, positioned his mouth so it was about four inches from my ear, and then left out one of the screams. Forty-eight hours later, and I’m still twitching.
I know who to blame – it’s those little girls. Those damn little girls, with their ringlets and pink dresses and ruffled socks, and horrible, horrible screams. And don't even get me started on the particularly sweet looking one who tried to steal Sam's lunch box, and when thwarted, shoved him into the cupboard so hard, I could hear his head crack against the door.
But at least Sam seems to be settling in. On Friday, he even let me leave him without suction cupping himself onto my body, and he gave his new teacher a kiss good-bye when he left. Which is progress. Definite progress.
Who knows, maybe we'll even eventually get to the point where I stop feeling like I'm sending him off to a toddler version of Lord of the Flies three mornings a week.
Posted by Whitney at 6:00 AM | Comments (4)
Comments
As the mother of a couple of former squealing preschoolers, I would be glad to tell you how I saved my eardrums: the outside voice.
When one uses it, one promtly gets dumped into the backyard to screech away. Alone. That gets old really fast. It works best if you can contain the twitching enough to feign a vague disinterest.
Good luck.
Posted by: MC at August 27, 2006 8:59 AM
We use the "indoor voice" "outdoor voice" trick too. And Whitney? Just wait until he starts real school, and suddenly Mommy, who was the center of his universe, is nothing but chopped liver and it's all "well, my TEACHER said we should do it this way" or "my TEACHER says this is right, so you're wrong."
big suckage. sigh
Princess's first grade teacher says it happens to teachers, too - for a year she's the center of the educational universe, then the next year it's all about the 2nd grade teacher and she's left in the dust. This teaching them to be independent thing really can be painful.
Posted by: Alesia Holliday ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.literarychicks.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at August 27, 2006 10:26 AM
Oh, the girlie squeal. I still occasionally emit it. When my sisters and I are all together, even my extremely serious Associate Dean sister will let one fly. I don't know how my parents used to survive family vacations when we'd get together with my aunt's family and there would be six little girls running around in a squealing, screaming pack.
The LC Eileen
Posted by: Eileen at August 27, 2006 12:16 PM
Oh, I know that squeal. I was never a screamer myself, but for some reason my 13 year old daughter has suddenly found her girlie genes or something because all of a sudden she has become a scream queen!! She is driving me crazy!! She screams if a bug comes too close to her or her sister scares her or she wakes up suddenly or... really, it doesn't seem to matter WHAT it is, she just screams! ARGH!!
And her older sister is a drama queen herself--EVERYTHING must be made from a molehill into a mountain! I called her principal Friday--the girls have been in school since Wednesday--and BEGGED her to put DD#1 back into resource, because if she had to remain in regular study hall for the next 9 months I think I would go crazy!! She is so paranoid about breaking a rule, and the teacher is STRICT, and she can't ask questions or talk... I broke after only two days of listening to her stress and screech!!
The screaming in your ear part had me chuckling--the girls and I take turns sneaking up on each other and trying to scare the other one. I can pretty much hold down the initial start to a mere twitch, which frustrates the heck out of them, because I get them every time! Bwa ha ha ha!!!
Posted by: Sheri at August 28, 2006 3:38 AM
