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August 27, 2006
Are you ready for some football?
Nooooooooo!
Labor Day approaches, and that means only one thing. Well, it used to mean lots of things: starting a new school year, the change of seasons, buying a new collection of fabulous woolly sweaters…
But now we live in Arizona and we have no kids. So there is no back-to-school shopping. (And certainly no woolly sweaters. We consider a rainy sixty degrees in December to be “absolutely freezing—wear a coat or you’ll catch your death.”) I grew up in New England and the Midwest and while I don’t miss the frigid wind chill or raking leaves, I do get nostalgic for the smell of wood-burning stoves and the mournful honking of geese flying south.
Autumn now means a much-needed end to the marathon of scorching summer days hot enough to melt asphalt onto the tires of your parked car. It means we can actually walk the dogs before 10 pm without fear of burning their paw pads. It also means that the end of baseball season starts to overlap with the pre-season of a certain other professional sport, which brings me to my point:
Football season: why?
I hate to be all clichéd and eye-rollingly girly, but I plain and simple do not understand the game of football. Never have. Innumerable well-meaning friends have vowed to remedy this situation by sitting me down with ESPN and a bowl of popcorn, but even after they deliver expositional lectures more thorough and persuasive than my dissertation defense, I still have no idea what they’re talking about. I mean, I get that each team is trying to get the ball down to the goal post on the opposite side of the field, and I get that there are these things called “downs” and that everything is measured in yards, but after that, I’m out. I can never figure out why penalties are called or what all the referee hand signals mean or why there’s so much standing around.
And it’s not that I’m not sporty. I’m hella sporty! I’ll watch basketball, hockey, and baseball (go, Cubs!) with delight. It’s just…football makes me feel like Whitney used to feel in physics class.
Also, football is the gateway drug for that most vile and insidious societal ill: Fantasy football. Where grown men disappear for days on end, strategizing about their “draft picks” with the fevered, furtive intensity of a certain domestic doyenne about to embark on some serious insider trading. And then, of course, their “team” progress must be monitored through the entire season (and it’s a loooong way from pre-season to the playoffs) by devoting every Sunday to watching all televised games.
Not that I personally know anyone obsessed with fantasy football. That’s just what I’ve heard. (Cough, cough.)
What a waste to spend the last crisp days of fall inside when you could be mulling cider, taking trips to the apple orchard, driving through the Berkshires to “leaf peep”…that’s it; we’re moving back to the East coast.
So feed my wistful, displaced soul: what do you love about fall where you live? (And you better not say “football.” Unless your child is a linebacker for the Bears or something, in which case I’ll let it slide. And hey, if the kid’s any good, I know someone who’d love to add him to a fantasy football team…)
Posted by Beth at 11:25 PM | Comments (15)
Comments
Fall is my favorite time of year. The days are still warm enough to wear shorts but the nights are crisp and cold and you can finally snuggle under a light down blanket and sleep all cozy!
I love to watch the leaves change color also. Believe it or not, Modesto puts on quite a show in the fall! We are a Tree City, USA, and we have many trees that change colors--maples, pistachios, liquid amber, birch, aspens--just to name a few! My girls love to rake leaves and jump in the piles with the little neighbor kids.
Coffee tastes good in the mornings again and I love Saturdays when I don't have to work and can make a pot of coffee and sit in my chair by the big front window and sip on a steaming cup of my favorite java while I watch the leaves fall. Mmm--I can hardly wait!!
PS--and it is also the start of FOOTBALL season! Yay! Only sport that I watch with any regularity--sorry, Beth! I was raised on football... :~D
Posted by: Sheri at August 28, 2006 3:50 AM
I thought I had football figured out- then we moved to Canada and all the rules are different. Argh. They have "football camp" for interested parties here. You go to the stadium, the team tosses the ball around with you, the coaches explain the game and then they have cocktails. Very nice.
Posted by: Eileen at August 28, 2006 10:48 AM
What I like about fall is the rain.
Posted by: TeresaH at August 28, 2006 10:52 AM
Oh, Beth, Thing One is now a tight end for the Freshman football team here. Dinner conversations go like this:
Thing One: So I pancaked that tall dude on the JV team during scrimmage.
Cowboy: Dude! So all those bird dogs are paying off, eh?
It's like they're speaking a foreign language. Now, all three of them are in a fantasy football league together.
What do I like about fall? Well, I can get a lot of work done on the weekends because they're all so busy watching and talking about football that no one knows that I'm even here.
The LC Eileen
Posted by: Eileen ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.literarychicks.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at August 28, 2006 1:27 PM
You must have not gone to a College with a good football team! I didn't "get it" either until I did. Go 'Canes!!!! hehe Nothing like your team to root for and have all the pre and post parties centered around it to get you into the games. Now, on the topic of Fantasy Football, I'm TOTALLY with you. My husband drives me up a wall with that; it's bad enough he is his team's "commish" *eye roll* but he also has to pay extra to get the NFL Ticket thingy from Directv so he can watch as many games as possible, along with paying extra on the internet to track progress and the laptop is next to him all day Sunday. *sigh* So, as for Fall fun things... not much... we live in FL where the leaves don't change colors and we can still head to the beach until nearly December. LOL
Posted by: Amber at August 28, 2006 1:45 PM
Sorry, it's a cult. Go Buckeyes!!! And I never understood basketball. Run up the court, run back down the court, wear silly satin shorts, run back up the court, punch somebody. Who really cares?
And professional sports of any kind - forget it. Strictly an amateur/college fan. Grown men being paid huge amounts of money to throw a ball around when our teachers can't afford to eat drives me freaking insane.
Posted by: Alesia Holliday at August 28, 2006 4:46 PM
Eileen and I attended a fairly (really?) poor football school, where the only way that they could get enough attendence at games was to allow (mostly fraternities) to haul kegs up into the stands. Really, not kidding.
Alesia - sounds like you understand basketball perfectly to me. But then, I'm not a fan...
And fantasy leagues... I'm in one because I have a group of close friends in it. I regularly get my butt handed to me because I just can't pay close enough attention to it - I mean, I watch games, have a couple of beers, but to follow the stats closely enough to do well, is just not me. But my buddies are just nuts.
Signed,
Cowboy - hoping that the Cowboys do well this year, and lamenting the end of baseball season, happening all too quickly.
Posted by: Cowboy at August 28, 2006 6:33 PM
Football is a touchy, but amusing subject in my household.
Many years ago, back when the earth cooled, in an effort to impress my "first love" who hailed from Texas, I became a Cowboy fan (I hear ya Cowboy - keeping fingers crossed here as well.) Well that romance crashed and burned, but not my romance with the Cowboys. As fate would have it, I married a equally commited Giant's fan. (For those unaware the Giants and Cowboys are in the same division - ergo - rivals!!)
So Dear Husband and I agree to disagree and go to our separate corners when our teams play eachother.
However, the irony of it all that never ceases to amaze me. Come this October, we hit the 28 years married mile marker. Who would have thunk it?
LOL
Posted by: Cindi at August 28, 2006 9:13 PM
Don't get me wrong, I love, love, love football (go Steelers!!), after all I was born in Pittsburgh where they slap you in a Terrible Towel the second you are born. But football is not my favorite thing about fall. I love the fall leaves. I live in Oklahoma now, where everything just turns brown in the fall. My addiction in the fall in a website called fallinpa.com. I can watch the leaves change on live action cameras set up in scenic areas of Pennsyvania. Man, I miss the north this time of year. I'll just stare at the monitor and sigh. My kids will pat me on the head and shake their heads at crazy ol' mom. I've lived in Ok. for 11 years and still miss the fall.
Displaced Yankee
Posted by: Berni at August 28, 2006 10:21 PM
Cowboy and Cindi--I was a Cowboy fan for many, MANY years. I remember being in Washington once and watching a game in a room full of Seahawks fans and being the one Cowboy fan--I excaped with my life, but it was interesting! I LOVED Roger Staubach--he was an amazing quarterback. However, when they fired Coach Landry, I couldn't get past that--have never cared for Jimmy Johnson and his gang and have never cheered for the Cowboys since! And yes, in my household my dad was a 49er's fan so we were always on opposing sides!
I don't have a favorite team anymore--I now go for the team with players that I like. I still hold out hope for the '9ers to have a great team again, but I'm not counting on it any time in the near future... I will NOT EVER be a Raiders fan--can't stand them, and I live in Raider Country!! (Scary stuff sometimes--you should see the fans getting on the BART trains for a game--they are the ones that sit in the Black Hole or whatever they call it.... *shudder*) Come football season Modesto is all silver and black or red and gold--all die hards here in the Valley!! Go '9ers!!
Posted by: Sheri at August 29, 2006 9:24 AM
Sheri,
Things One and Two still talk about the time we were taking the train home from the Bay Area on a night that the Raiders won. Let's just say that things never actually got out of control, but they were balancing on a knife's edge.
Berni,
One of my favorite players is with the Steelers. Troy Polamalu. Love him love him love him.
The LC Eileen
Posted by: Eileen at August 29, 2006 4:59 PM
My favorite Steeler is Big Ben, but Troy comes in a close second.
Posted by: Berni at August 30, 2006 10:11 PM
I was born in Green Bay and we live about an hour away from Lambeau Field. Thus I am a Packers Fan. I know more people who have season tickets than library cards! It is a religion around here. The lives of thousands of people revolve around this team throughout the entire year. Rarely a day goes by when the first item on the 6:00 news sports report isn't about them.
Posted by: sal at August 30, 2006 11:24 PM
But you asked what I love about fall...I love that I get to bring out all my sweaters. I get to start wearing jeans again. I love taking walks through the neighborhood and seeing the jack-o-lanterns on front porches. I love the smell in the morning...that crisp autumn smell when there is just a touch of frost on the ground and the leaves have begun to fall. I love that there aren't any more bugs around! I love that you can start to see your breath in the air again. I love taking my coffee outside in the morning and sitting on my back porch and watching the geese fly overhead, honking. I love raking the leaves with my husband - this year our daughter too. I love curling up on the couch with a good book and having the furnace kick in and feeling the warm blast of air on my face. I love having it get dark early once the time changes so I can go to bed early without feeling guilty! I love that fall signals the holidays are going to be here soon.
I have a good idea there are lots more things I love about fall, but this is a good start! :)
Posted by: sal at August 30, 2006 11:34 PM
Sal--so it IS true about everyone having season tickets?! I used to crack up at that commercial that was on a few years ago. The family is all packed up, saying a fond farewell to their neighbors. They get in the car and drive off, and suddenly the whole neighborhood erupts as the cry of "They're gone--season tickets are available!!" (or something like that) goes up and everyone is scrambling to be the first ones to get those tickets... I love Wisconsin, and I cheer for the Pack all the time! And all that stuff you love--ditto that for me! :~D
Posted by: Sheri at September 1, 2006 10:03 AM
