« My inner child | Main | Me and My Big Mouth »
September 15, 2006
I Did But I Definitely Wouldn't Now
When hindsight is 20/20
So it’s my turn to kick of theme week! Hooray. I love themes. They’re a lot like matching shoes and handbags, which is another favorite past time of mine. So, in honor of my latest release “I Did (But I Wouldn’t Now)” this week’s theme is: Regret.
In “I Did (But I Wouldn’t Now)” my main character, Lily, marries a rock star in training who hits it big, cheats on her, and then moves out. Marrying said rock star becomes Lily’s biggest regret.Now, I’ve been lucky enough so far not to have married a rock star, or even dated one for longer than six months, but I do have my share of regrets.
There are plenty of times I wish I could shout “do-over,” but unfortunately, life doesn’t have a rewind button. If it did, I so would have listened to my roommate in college about carb-loading BEFORE hitting the bars for shots.
Now, I’ve been lucky enough so far not to have married a rock star, or even dated one for longer than six months, but I do have my share of regrets. There are plenty of times I wish I could shout “do-over,” but unfortunately, life doesn’t have a rewind button. If it did, I so would have listened to my roommate in college about carb-loading BEFORE hitting the bars for shots.
My problem with regret is that I have plenty of them. You have to divide them by category, really. Like everyone, I have plenty of dating regrets. There was my musician phase, which was disastrous, and then my Bad Boy phase, which was even worse. In college, I briefly dated an Israeli paratrooper who once beat up a homeless man who tried to take his wallet. Said Israeli paratrooper was a little unhinged to say the least. He had an anger management problem and a problem with spontaneously crying for no reason.
It was a little like dating Jean Claude Van Damme, if Van Damme had serious psychological problems.
And then there are professional regrets. Take, for instance, a job I held at what I call the Evil Spam Company five years ago. Yes, we sent spam. Of course, they were so evil, and I was so technologically clueless, that I didn’t realize that’s what we did until after about six months of working there. The job was miserable, but I met one of my best friends there, so I can’t say I wish I’d never worked there at all. Still, if I’d known I would have been spending eight hours a day proof-reading “Lower Your Mortgage Now” messages, I might have considered taking a different job. I’m only thankful that we didn’t actually send out any Viagra messages, which we left to our competitors.
And then there were the five years I spent working as a newspaper reporter. This was my first job out of school, and let me tell you, Lois Lane, I am not. Every time the police scanner went off, I’d want to go hide in the bathroom because I knew my editor would want to send me off to cover some brush fire, and I’d miss happy hour with my friends. It’s pretty clear where my priorities lay.
Of course, the silver lining of regrets is that they make fantastic stories. And who need therapy, when you can write a 350 page novel, thinly disguising the people who drove you nuts? Not to mention, when you write fiction, you get to end the story exactly the way you wanted things to end, unlike in life. That’s one of many reasons I love to write (and read) fiction. Regrets have a way of just working themselves out.
This blog was brought to you by
I Did, But I Wouldn't Now, Cara's hilarious novel about loving, leaving and starting over again.
Posted by at 9:59 AM | Comments (1)
Comments
I hear you on the regrets issue. I look back at some of the decisions I have made in my life and I wonder if I would have done anything differently if I was given the chance to go back and change them. Honestly, I don't think I would change too much because for every bad decision there were always two or three good decisions! And those bad decisions are what shaped my life and my life isn't so bad...
I mean, if I had done what I thought I would do, I would be writing this from some beach house near Santa Cruz, with my dog at my feet and my next novel just finished on the table, waiting for my rewrites before I send it back to the editor. But I wouldn't have my husband and my kids, and it just wouldn't be as much fun living my life alone without them...
Sorry, no rock stars in my past--I hardly ever dated before I met my husband!!
Posted by: Sheri at September 18, 2006 4:11 PM


