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September 18, 2006
I DID but I WOULDN’T NOW
NOT ON A BET
Okay, first, the final wrap up from the Two Truths and a Lie contest! Here are the answers and not one of you got all 7 right, which shows how very tricky we at the LC are!
THE LIES:
[UPDATE: I'm an idiot!! Beth IS afraid of cats - her grandfather did NOT pitch for the Yankees!! But I'm far too sick to go back and recalculate (miserable head cold), so if this makes you really have 4 or more right, please email me your addy and I'll send you a prize, too.) sigh
BETH KENDRICK is afraid of cats. But not of dogs.!
CARA LOCKWOOD is NOT a size zero, and on fat days, a two. We LOVE her for that.
EILEEN RENDAHL did NOT, when she was in college, accidentally set fire to her apartment by forgetting to turn off a space heater when she went to class. But if she had, she probably would have licked the firemen.
WHITNEY GASKELL did NOT, in the seventh grade, win her school spelling bee. She SUCKS at spelling (her words, no hate mail, please
ALESIA HOLLIDAY does NOT love bluegrass music. But she did want to be, in no particular order, a WEREWOLF, an INTERNATIONAL JEWEL THIEF, and a FAMOUS WRITER when she grew up. She’s still working on the famous part . . .
LANI DIANE RICH did NOT work as a teller at a bank and get held up at gunpoint by a 13-year-old kid who then escaped on his Schwinn. But her friend DID.
MICHELLE CUNNAH has eaten every kind of food in the known universe.
So the WINNERS ARE: JANINA – Big winner with FIVE right! And, what the heck, Cate, Teresa H., Pearl, and KimW should each win something for 4 right! Thanks for playing! And email me at alesia@alesiaholliday.com with your snail mail addy for prizes!
So, speaking of wanting to be a WEREWOLF, let’s get back to Cara’s theme week and talk about the jobs that I had but would NEVER work again. Like Taco Ole on all-you-can-eat-burrito day at the Ohio State University. Go Buckeyes never had such a nasty connotation!! Think large football players and lots and lots of beans . . .
OR pickup salesperson at a business newspaper in Columbus, Ohio. Which meant I had to go around to all the skanky businesses that nobody else wanted to sell to and try to sell ads. On commission only, of course.
OR insurance sales – which sounded fairly respectably to a 20-something until your VERY FIRST DAY, when they ask you to list and call 100 of your closest family and friends and try to pimp out life insurance.
OR T.A. at graduate school, when you’re working on a PhD and being treated like slave labor. For $325 per month.
OR associate at a big defense law firm, where the money comes from billing by the hour, so the unspoken rule is to be as inefficient as possible.
OR cocktail waitress at a place where they make you wear a porn director’s fantasy of a WWII nurse’s outfit that’s so short your butt cheeks nearly hang out while you work from 3 pm till 2 in the morning with NO breaks and NO food.
OR working in a city that requires an hour to hour and a half-long commute EACH WAY.
OR, in fact, and especially after the lovely experience of only having to call in sick to MYSELF Friday when the miserable cold from hell took me down and OUT (I was very understanding to myself), I never, ever again want to work at any job that requires any more of a commute than I have now: up my stairs to my office with my pugs.
And, really, I know it: I have the best job in the world. Well, except for international jewel thief – and anyway, I heard that though the pay is good, the hours are lousy. Plus there’s that pesky Interpol.
So tell me: what horrible job did you have that you would never, EVER do again?
Hugs,
Alesia
This blog was brought to you by I Did, But I Wouldn't Now, Cara's hilarious novel about loving, leaving and starting over again.
Posted by Alesia at 6:00 AM | Comments (8)
Comments
I would never ever work at McDonalds again. Where initiative and efficiency is always followed up by she's bossing me around. And you had to wear hair nets.
Or bartend in a disco where you're always in immediate danger of being barfed on, or having popcorn machines fall on you.
And while I enjoyed working in the art gallery, there was that day when the colorblind woman threw a pile of mat samples at me.
Quite happy in my upstairs office that has Three, count them three windows. Which is much better than my previous office that was in the basement.
Posted by: cindy at September 18, 2006 7:49 AM
Actually, the job I am currently at, only with the old boss. How did I ever survive that? Now my job is more demanding, I do more, and more is expected of me. But the boss gives me credit for having a brain, and has matched my pay to what I do. Love her.
Oh, and teaching music. Will NEVER do that again, as I received more angry phone calls at midnight from parents who were ticked about something I had no control over. They actually blamed me when a blizzard postponed a contest. I kid you not. So one year proved to me that I never want to teach again. That was a $40K college education down the tubes.
Posted by: Cate at September 18, 2006 8:44 AM
I will NEVER work retail with a specific company like I did after college. They blamed me for everything, when I was busting my behind to keep the place going without help from the manager (who had personal problems) or the district manager(who treated our store like we had a communicable disease).
Posted by: Hope at September 18, 2006 8:48 AM
Never ever will I work at a job that has basically nothing to do but be there. I worked for a major oilfield service evenings and about all there was to do was answer the phone. It got extremely boring and the shifts would drag along so slowly that it felt like I was working doubles all the time! I would rather be a little busier!
I would never ever work at a Dairy Queen again. Nuff said about that.
Posted by: TeresaH at September 18, 2006 9:07 AM
I used to work for pee-drinkers.
The job itself wasn't bad. I laid out their catalog and helped write copy for their pee-drinking products, but those people were seriously nuts! And not just because they drank their own pee!
The LC Eileen
Posted by: Eileen ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.literarychicks.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at September 18, 2006 10:33 AM
I won! (insert Halleluia Chorus here) So now I need to know if the webbed feet help his swimming. Do they?
Okay, on to the subject at hand.
I'll never work retail again. Getting treated like a mentally retarded slave for pennies on the hour is not my cup of Earl Grey thankyouverymuch!
I'll never work in the medical field either. Kinda like working in a sausage factory: Once you've been behind the scenes, you want nothing to do with it.
I'll never work P.R. again. It's been about five years but the bite marks are still there.
Posted by: Janina at September 18, 2006 10:39 AM
I will never ever work as a flight attendant (aka Stewardess) again. Not that they would have me back now that I am aged and wrinkled (somewhat). But Honest-to-Pete is was the WORST job ever. I was based in Toronto and in the 6 months I worked there, I made it Cleveland, Sudbury (don't ask), Ottawa (always 3 times in one day) and Winnipeg. It was awful.
Posted by: Cynthia at September 19, 2006 7:00 PM
Congrats to all the winners. I emailed you, did you get it?
Posted by: TeresaH at September 20, 2006 5:58 AM
