I would like to be able to eat anything I want and never get fat. Can you tell I went back on my diet?

LC Eileen

But see, we wouldn't even really need to worry about the time-zone problem -- I'd be so freaking lucky, that as soon as we got to Paris, we'd just happen to find a fantastic little restaurant that just happens to be open very, very late, which just happens to be offering the world's best food for free.

How lucky is that?

Eh, par for the course for Super Lucky Guy.

But, George, you're already married to Whitney. How much luckier can you get? :-)

LC Eileen

Eileen is officially my favorite Literary Chick.

Would it be too mean if I wanted the power to make stupid people shut up with just a look?

Lauren, I don't think that would be mean at all. Mean would be making obnoxious children turn bright green and their voices sound like they'd just inhaled helium. That's the power I want.

Ooooo--I may have that super power already! The one where you can make stupid people shut up with just a look? Yep--I've been told I could wilt a daffodil in the middle of winter with just a look. I'm not sure about that, but I have been known to stop idiots cold in the middle of a particularly inane babble with just a "look"! There's a reason I wear dark sunglasses while driving the bus--the power must only be used for good---mwhahahahaha!!!! Now if I can just figure out a way to use my power to keep those same stupid people off of the roads on the morning commute....

I hadn’t even thought of getting an evil mutant power . . . this is opening up new possibilities for me.

Maybe my power should be having the right to vaporize anyone who annoys me while I’m driving. Yes, I understand that sounds harsh, but if you’re going to drive fifteen miles under the speed limit, you should be prepared for the consequences.

Oh, and I also want to be able to vaporize people who talk during movies.

I pretty much want to be able to use my vaporization skills at all times.

Yes!! The movie vaporizer is brilliant, Whitney.

I especially love when my husband and I manage our one night out every six months and some jackass in the row right behind us (who has apparently seen the movie ten times already) leads an external monologue to his buddy about what is happening next. Nice.

I always get stuck next to those talking assholes in movie theatres.

Some day ask George about the time when I was pregnant with Sam, and the mouth breathers sitting next to us wouldn’t shut up. I had a complete hormone-induced meltdown in the middle of the theatre.

During this melt down – specifically after the portion where I had just finished screaming about the sad lack of manners in our culture – the female mouth breather actually said, “Oh, yeah? Well, you’re fat.”

To which I responded, “I’m not fat, you moron. I’m pregnant.”

It was one of my finer moments. (Although George remembers it somewhat less fondly . . . mostly recalling it as the moment when his previously calm, rational wife turned into a screeching lunatic in the middle of a crowded movie theatre.)

My super-power would be the ability to stall the motors of those drivers who do stupid things. It's kinda like Sheri's "look" only it works on cars. One stony glare and then pfffft. Nuthin.

My targets? Those who drive along the shoulder during a traffic jam and then try to cut in when they see a cop. One stony look -- now you're stalled. Which is the only reason to be on the shoulder, really.

Or anyone with kids without car restraints. Stony glare! Buckle those kiddies in, or a stalled car will be the least of your worries.

Or those demonstrating an unhealthy tendency for road rage. Go ahead. Give me the salute. I dare ya. One stony glare and ooops... lookie there. Yer stalled. Now you're mad AND late.

Red-light runners, speeders on residential streets, anyone with a hateful bumper sticker... beware! Cynthia's stony glare can stop you in your tracks...

I saw a bumper sticker that said "Being stupid should be painful." It'd be so much simpler if idiots would writhe in agony and I'd know just how stupid they were by their misery. (sigh)
But I'd rather have the invisibility-teleport-zapping power. That, and Eileen's svelte-all-you-can-eat power so I can wear really hot super spandex suits.

I ALWAYS tell Dave that I want to be able to teleport everywhere I go. Tell George that it's simple-- as long as you have your basic longitudes and latitudes worked out, you can teleport all day long. And if you arrive at an inconvenient time-- why, just teleport back again and try the next day!

To be greedy or to be evil, that is the question... I pick BOTH! I like George's Mutant Lucky Power... I want a version of that one, and for my evil mutant power I choose the power to eliminate the genitalia of those who use their genitalia for evil and not for consentual pleasure. Especially, the genitalia of teachers that sleep with their underage students. Sickos! One look and zap their pleasure boxes or rods are nothing but a thing of the past.

I think I watch too much news television.