« Care and Feeding, Part VI, by Oh Patient One | Main | Spin, Little LC Dreidels, Spin! »
December 18, 2006
The Cookietacular cookie exchange
Was that an ungreased pan?
Okay, so I’ve admitted before that I’m no Betty Crockpot. But I’ve discovered a new invention that is heaven on earth for a mad stress baker like me – the Cookie Exchange. (Okay, so it’s not new, but I’ve never been to one before. Can you give me a HALLELUJAH?)
I am surrounded by cookies. Rolling in cookies. Boxing up dozens and dozens of lovely cookies to give away to my darling agent and my lovely editor and her assistant and the art department and everyone else who cared enough to make my career all bright and shiny this year.
Did I mention I baked 48 dozen cookies in the past two days? Of eight different varieties?? Yes, clearly I'm insane.
But my TOTAL HERO, the woman voted “acts most like me when I had a newborn” is the lovely Krystle (who had a baby not quite 4 months ago and still managed to look like a fashion model; all together now, deep breath and let’s not hate her because, well, you’ll see, plus there is colic which is pretty much the reason people in olden times left babies on hillsides, but I digress).
Let’s set the scene:
My very kind and gracious neighbor Mary, who invited us to her home (she works full time, has a small child and her house still looked like the centerfold for HOUSE BEAUTIFUL magazine, while mine currently looks like the “BEFORE” photo in an ad for housecleaning services, oh and she’s way younger and prettier than me, but she’s funny as hell, so all together now, deep breath and let’s not hate her) had us over this afternoon for a cookie exchange.
No kids, no husbands. That alone was enough to send me into a zone of utter happiness.
We each brought several dozen cookies (of a single type, and yes, I had a blonde moment where I thought she meant I had to bring 12 dozen cookies of 12 different kinds and she was very kind and didn’t even ask where my Valium was) and we traded. So we each went home with a dozen or so different kinds of lovely cookies. All wrapped and ribboned and with recipes attached.
You see? This is SERIOUSLY WONDERFUL. And there was WINE. And real food. Actual adult conversation, where nobody whined or called me Mommy even once. Yep, having a great time. So we were talking about kids, as moms who get together often do, and Krystle admitted she didn’t actually have time to do cookies. In fact, she wasn’t the baking type, but more the professional type who happened to be on maternity leave with her beautiful but colicky baby. So, we had this conversation:
Krystle: So I brought the slice and bake kind of cookies.
Me: Hey, it’s pretty impressive that you even managed to get dressed and turn the oven on with a colicky baby. When Science Boy had colic, I sometimes never managed to PEE until after 5 in the evening.
Krystle: [giving me a strange look] Oh, no, I didn’t bake them.
Me: ??
Krystle: I brought the dough.
Me, and everyone else: [Howling laughter]
Sure enough, my new hero Krystle bought slice and bake cookie packages and gave each person DOUGH.
But it GETS EVEN BETTER. We were supposed to bring ½ dozen for each person, individually wrapped. So, yep. You guessed it.
She brought us each ONE HALF OF A COOKIE DOUGH PACKAGE.
I love this woman, who is possibly the smartest person ON THE PLANET. She came, she sliced, she conquered. This is efficiency, baby. And she looked like a super model doing it.
My New Year’s Resolution? I want to be just like Krystle. Or Mary. Or both. But after I eat all these cookies, I’ll probably weigh more than both of them put together. Which leads me to January’s blog, about the Evil Empire that is the diet industry in America. But, hey, we can worry about that next month. For today? Happy holidays!! Eat some cookies.
hugs,
Alesia, snug in her sugar coma
Posted by Alesia at 6:00 AM | Comments (11)
Comments
Krystle is surely New Best Friend material! I would never even think to just buy and bring dough, but hey, that's a great idea. Of course, in my house, that dough would NEVER actually become cookies. Oh no. It would be attacked by a half dozen spoons as soon as it was discovered. That's what happens to the dough around here. I buy it and have every intention of turning it into actual cookies, but it ends up on the end of a spoon and I'm left with nothing but an empty, gooey package.
Posted by: dee at December 18, 2006 12:24 PM
I don't know what's funnier . . . that she brought the dough, or that you captured it on film!
I think I love you both . . .
Posted by: Whitney at December 18, 2006 12:32 PM
Mmmmmm, Dee, cookie dough! Love it!
Whitney, I had today's blog to think of, of COURSE I had to snap that picture! :)
Posted by: Alesia Holliday ![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://www.literarychicks.com/nav-commenters.gif)
at December 18, 2006 12:35 PM
I think I love Krystle, too! I love her packaging. New Mom Cookies, indeed! Although I have to admit, I've managed to screw up slice and bake cookies. You know the holiday ones with little designs? Well, apparently, they're supposed to say "Ho Ho Ho" and not "Oh Oh Oh."
LC Eileen
Posted by: Eileen at December 18, 2006 1:46 PM
We have a Chinese restaurant near us named The Happy Ho. Seriously.
Posted by: Alesia Holliday at December 18, 2006 1:56 PM
Well, our latest movie quote in the house comes from "The Ice Harvest", which just didn't hold up to "Bad Santa" as our best holiday movie, but I digress. Oliver Platt, thoroughly in his cups in the bar, greets his friend John Cusack with "Ho ho ho Mo Fo!"
It's our new Christmas greeting!
Posted by: Cowboy at December 18, 2006 2:04 PM
Oh, that is a SCREAM. How funny is that! Love it.
I wonder what my son's teachers would do if I started giving them dough? Hmmmm...
Posted by: Michelle at December 18, 2006 9:29 PM
Along the lines of giving your son's teachers dough...why not include the greeting from above (Ho ho ho Mo Fo)?
Posted by: Michele (note the one L) at December 18, 2006 11:28 PM
Cowboy-
Ice harvest, huh? We'll have to check that out. Any movie that has both John Cusack and a line like "Ho ho ho mo fo" has got to be worth seeing!
Posted by: dee at December 19, 2006 12:46 AM
OMG! Tell Krystle she's got fans! LOL!
Posted by: Lani at December 20, 2006 8:37 PM
OMG, the best idea *ever*. Although I have to say that it hurts like a "ho ho ho mo fo" when I laugh at the moment so you caused me great pain in the reading of this blog. I should know better. Because I always laugh. It just doesn't usually hurt like this. Stupid cough.
Posted by: Dia at December 21, 2006 3:37 AM
